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Thursday, 6th November

I got to school at 9:30am and started to work for the project. I printed pictures on normal A4 paper and tracing paper, cut them, stuck them on transparent boards and put the transparent boards on top of each other.

I made this sample slightly differently from the idea I thought initially thought of. Mainly the concept is about death, and on the previous day, I was thinking "the death is always next to us." But my new idea is "we are walking on a road of our own lives," and it has also the meaning "we do not know the end of the road." We are just walking on it to the end. As changing my mind, I stopped to use a bed, instead of that, I made a road on the image.

In the morning, I heard of my friend's death. His early death was extremely surprising and sad for me and my friends who know him. I was shocked and cried when I heard it, but I have been alright because I was thinking about "death" so much as this week's project by chance, and also I quite often think about our lives and death, so I accepted his death the same day. Saying like the way of my work, his road of his life has ended.

When I heard the news, I was thinking the reasons why he died, what made him die or what he was feeling before he died etc? We might have been able to save him. We could we have done for him. Even if I was thinking about this event, nothing can change it, so we just should accept the fact and care about each other as much as we can.

I do not have any thoughts like there is a heaven or his soul is around us etc. Of course, I believe there is the heaven in the mind of the people who believe there is, but in my mind, the heaven does not exist, so I feel his life has just finished. My opinion is that he became nothing else, so we can not tell him anything, and we can not do anything for him. The thing we can do now is to support the people who have been left. We should write messages about him for them or making something which can be memorable. And we should also support each other and live for the future, happily, with the strong minded in the world that Tetsuya can not experience.

The weird thing I found is that I was thinking about death for some reasons all the while, I was unaware of Tetsuya's death. He passed away last weekend, and when I was thinking about the concept of this project, I had no idea my friend had died. I mentioned I do not have any thoughts like a heaven, soul or ghost etc., but I believe the human mind has a deep/dark ability within us to somehow reach these 'senses'. 

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